If It's Broke, Let's Fix It
With Gratitude April 16
“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to a better understanding of ourselves.”
-Carl Jung
Things break around my house. That is just a fact. In early winter, I was standing outside my door, leaning over to pick up a package, and a huge gust of wind blew the screen door back all the way and almost off its hinges. I was very angry at myself and at the door. To myself, for being so careless when I knew it was windy out. To the door for not closing correctly after that happened.
Accidents happen and things get broken. The real test of my program in any given day is my response to it. I can react terribly and start screaming and whining, or I could just realize that things are what they are in certain circumstances. The same is true with my reaction to the alcoholic. It is the natural state of an alcoholic to drink: that’s what alcoholics do. Far too often, however, I react to the alcoholic’s drinking with a tantrum because I don’t want to accept that it happened AGAIN. I get just as angry at the drinking alcoholic as I do at the screen door.
When I fully understand the first step, I can begin to see alcoholism as a disease. There is no rhyme or reason for why the alcoholic picks up the drink again and again. I do know from my personal recovery in AA that if I let up on my program of action, I am sure to drink again. I have to be willing to live and work my program one day at a time every single day. There are no days off.
Today’s Prayer
God, I am having a hard time with an alcoholic in my life. Why does he or she not do the things they need to do to stay continuously sober? Only you can unlock this mystery, Lord. Please help me understand alcoholism as a disease and give me the strength to recover from the effects of alcoholism in me.