“For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good.”
-Matthew 5:45
One of the most profound memories I have of that last month of drinking is how much I hated daylight. I stayed in a dark apartment for weeks on end and detested when I had to go out into the sun. I would squint as I ventured out for a few seconds to take the dog out or to get the paper, and then I would race back inside.
This is a sad memory, because I was a person who always loved the sun. The sunrise as I was driving to work and the sunset in the evening were two of my favorite times of day. God’s creation and the cycling of time carried me with a sense of purpose. Drugs and alcohol took that from me. I was living like a vampire: my morals were shot and evil had taken over my very being.
I am lucky today to be sober. I am lucky to have enough willingness to keep working a program after all of these years. As the sun rises for yet another beautiful day, I can once again cherish the light it brings in all of God’s glory. As I see the setting sun tonight between the trees in my backyard, I will thank God again for another sober day.
Today’s Prayer
God, I gave up so much for my alcoholism. Today, help me be grateful for the little things you have given me back, like the sun, and the big things as well, like my morality. I have a lot to be grateful for today.