“Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done.”
-Matthew 6:10
I used to live my life 100% on self-will. Even worse, I let my emotions direct every decision I made. My life was a complete disaster. I was a drunken mess who was the proverbial tornado, blasting all the lives around me.
Unfortunately, my life in early sobriety was much the same. I had put the drink down, but I was still living on self-will. Until I got a sponsor who was insistent that I work all twelve steps, it didn’t really matter that I was in AA. I was a meeting maker who came in for a quick dose of relief and then went on living in insanity.
That is why my absolute focus on God’s will for me is so critical to my continued sobriety and sanity. When I seek God’s kingdom first, as it says in the Scriptures, everything else seems to fall into place for me. God’s will goes something like this: “My child, your life is no longer any of your business. I will take it from here. I will not be needing your help today.”
Today’s Prayer
God, sometimes it is so easy for me to fall back into the insanity of self-will. Keep my focus on you, God. You do a much better job with my life than I do.
A grateful alcoholic never has to take a drink. I appreciate your post, because without a higher power, without a good sponsor to guide me, I'm simply dry. My sponsor and my previous sponsor (she died from pancreatic cancer, sober and grateful to the end) both had/have a response to me whenever I would get a "good idea." It was "well, how's that working for you?" Not good without a higher power, not good without guidance. With 36 years of continuous sobriety, I am led by gratitude, guidance, and service.