Why I Bought a New Big Book

My A.A. Big Book History

“We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day ‘Thy will be done.’ We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions.”

-Alcoholics Anonymous p. 88 (Step Eleven)

I have ordered a new 4th Edition Big Book. Our text, Alcoholics Anonymous, published the 4th Edition in 2001, just four years before I got sober. It is still the edition in current use. I own a copy of every edition of our precious text. I have a first edition that was a re-print done specially for the 75th anniversary of its publication in 2014. It was that book I went through while listening to the Joe and Charlie tapes the Spring of 2020 when we were on lockdown.

I also own a 2nd Edition that my son, who is nonalcoholic but still loves our book, found at the Savers thrift store. I begged him to give me that book, and he graciously did. This was Fall of 2021. I remember it distinctly because I sent my book, With Gratitude, to A.A. World Services to get permission to use quotes from the Big Book and Twelve and Twelve, only to wait 3 long months to be told that I would be allowed to use a maximum six quotes from A.A. literature, which was all copyrighted. This was disheartening for a couple of reasons. First, A.A. works for us, because we are the membership, so the Big Book really belongs to all of us. Second, my book, written January-October 2021, has 366 distinct readings, and each reading starts with a quote. About 2/3 of the quotes are from A.A. literature. This rejection from A.A.W.S meant that I could not publish my book in its current form. It was January 2022 and I was both devastated and confused.

A sponsee who is very involved in service suggested I check into this online and see what others had done. What I discovered is that A.A.W.S approves almost no one. However, there are hundreds of books for sale on Amazon that use the Big Book, and there are even different versions of the Big Book itself that are not approved. These are full editions online available for reading that were not from A.A. itself. How was this possible? What I learned is that A.A. let their copyright expire for the 2nd edition. The copyright expired in the U.S. in 1983. That means the 2nd edition is now in the public domain and is free for anyone to reference in their own publications, whether that be in book form or on the internet. The public domain is only valid in the U.S., however, which is why I don’t offer my book internationally. If someone outside the United States wants my book, I ship it directly to them.

One Sunday night, having learned this information about the lapsed copyright, I sat down with my manuscript and went through every single quote and reading that was not part of the second edition. I changed entire readings from personal stories that were in the 3rd or 4th edition but were not in the 2nd. I took out all but 2 of my quotes from the Twelve and Twelve and replaced them with Big Book quotes. I got it all done in one night. I also went ahead and formatted the book and published on Amazon both a paperback copy and a Kindle e-book. I literally did all of this on January 30, 2022. And that was the day I published. I am amazed that I got this all done in one night. I was absolutely ready to give up on my little book. I wrote a disclaimer at the beginning that specifically stated that my book was not A.A. or Al-Anon approved. I registered my book with the Library of Congress and got my copyright protection. It was a lot of work, but I am still so proud of my book. To date I have sold 205 copies of With Gratitude—no bestseller but it is making an impact.

If George hadn’t given me that 2nd edition, I would not have had that book to make all of those changes on a Sunday night. It seems like God definitely had his hand in the middle of all of this.

My 3rd edition I bought just before my first A.A. anniversary. I was in Washington State to make direct amends to both my stepmom and my dad. The last day we went to Pike’s Place Market in Seattle. I had been to Pike’s Place several times before, and I always loved the used bookstores. In one of these bookstores on June 22, 2006, I found a practically new 3rd edition of the Big Book and bought it for $3. When I excitedly called a longtimer friend in the program and told him about my purchase, he said I had bought a “loser book.” The book was brand new, which meant zero steps were ever worked out of it. I am happy to tell you that this book has been well marked up for years now. I didn’t want to be a loser in sobriety who owned a loser book. That book now sits next to my chair and I use it when I write (as long as my quotes come from 1-164. I also use it for most of my online meetings. It is my favorite Big Book because it reminds me of the price I was willing to pay to keep it: making direct amends that led to freedom.

I have owned two different 4th editions, and these are the books I use for stepwork. They are the small paperback blue books. My first one, the one I did my own steps with, I lost in the 7am meeting in Las Vegas years back. So I bought its twin, and the first time I used this book was at a sponsorship workshop given my Katie P. in Las Vegas. I have all of the readings marked in Steps 1-3 to take sponsees more quickly through those decision steps—this with the goal of getting them on the fourth step inventory as soon as possible.

So why have I ordered a new 4th edition hardcover big book? Because I am finally going through my Steps in Al-Anon. I have never taken the 12 Steps in Al-Anon, and my thinking and behavior the last two years convinces me—has beaten me into a state of reasonableness—that I need to do so. I was lucky enough to find a group and sponsor who uses the Big Book for Al-Anon sponsorship. I have included a link to our meeting website for any who are curious. We meet twice a week at 7:30pm EDT on Mondays and Tuesdays. This is considered non-traditional Al-Anon, but this group and approach provides real solutions. There is a solution to the effects of alcoholism in the clear-cut directions to taking the Twelve Steps as originally written in the Big Book. I have been attending their meetings and doing random step work with a woman who is now officially my sponsor since July 2024, but now we will meet weekly and go through all of them, in order. I am excited once again to find my way out of alcoholism and its effects.

Happy Good Friday and Happy Easter to all of those who celebrate! I pray this weekend and this springtime brings a renewal of your mind, body, and spirit. I pray that we will all keep an open mind and an open heart about the power of God as he works through our recovery and the recovery of those we love. I also pray that God brings comfort to our friends and loved ones who are lost in this powerful disease. May God provide healing, comfort, peace, and, above all, love, to all those who are suffering. May God bless you and keep you. Amen.